Harry potter and the camping trip of doom
by Megan Uzuchiha
Summary: my friends and I wrote this story we do not own any of the characters J.K. Rowling does.


_**Harry Potter and the Camping Trips of Doom. A.k.a Pure Bloods are Screwed.**_

_**Writen by: Megan, Samantha, Amy, Kelly, and Sydney.**_

_** ((We did not create these characters they all belong to J.k.Rowling))  
**_

**N:** Voldemort has been defeated, killed by Trevor (Nevils pet toad). As the final exam is approching at Hogwarts, the 7th year students must survive a week in the forest led by their favorite teacherts Dumbledor and Hagrid. NOT! Like they're ever that lucky. They will actually be led by the ever snape-o-licious Snape (Megan: ewwwww), and should-totally-be-institutionalized Professor Triwnally.

**Snape:** Now children. You are to spend a week in this forest. Here are the rules you are not to use magic or objects you don't find in the woods. You must also hunt or find your own food. I will be in the motel down the road with my man-whores. Bye. snape then dissappears in a flash of pimpness.

**Harry: **Well this should be easy. Considering what we have been through in the past, with the whole Voldemort killing people thing, this should be a peice of cake.

**Ron:** Mmmmm cake

**Hermione : **What the hell Ron your hungry already!?!?!? And we just ate before we got here.

Ron ignores her and starts to munch on a twig.

**Ron :** Hey this isn't so bad. Get past the rotting bark and the termites and it's all good.

Hermione and Seamus share a look of disgust.

**Malfoy:** Where the hell is my latte! Where is that boy with my latte! He's not comeing is he?! IS HE!! Malfoy starts to sob uncontrolably

A horse emerges from the bushes.

**Dean**: OOO look a unicorn! Let's follow it to saftey.

**Malfoy:** I don't care about a fricken unicorn! If it doesn't have a latte for me I don't give a crap! Shakes Goyle violently.

**Goyle:** stares blankly

**Gary the Horse: **Hello I'm Gary the Horse. Im here to take you to a magical place.

**Harry: **Hogwarts?

**Gary the Horse: **No. Candy Mountain.

**Hermione: **This seems very familiar. has an epiphany HIDE YOUR KIDNEYS!

Ron is staring at a yummy looking twig and doesn't hear Hermione

**Gary the Horse: **says in a creepy voice Wheres Charlie have you seen Charlie?

Everyone loopks around for Charlie. When the students turn around they see that Gary the Horse has vanished.

**Hermionie:** Turns to Ron who is chewing on another twig. Ron I think your missing your kidney.

**Ron: **No! looks down Maybe. Looks down again damnit not again.

**Seamus: **Again?

**Harry: **Its a long story having to do with butter beer, a biscuit and angry pygmys.

students looked to Ron who is hunched on the ground with a laptop.

**Harry: **Ron what are you doing??

**Ron: **Im trying to buy my kidney back on Ebay. IT'S MY FRICKIN KIDNEY lovemonkey72! I WILL PREVAIL!

**Harry: **Ron where did you get the laptop?

**Ron: **Looking guilty Internet.

**Harry: **Where did you get th internet from?

**Ron:** I found it.

Harry glares at Ron

**Hermione: **Just let it go Harry. Just let it go.

Group has, somehow, ended up much deeper in the forest. A bear suddenly jumps out.

**Crabe**: BEAR! holding Draco in fetal position still crying about his latte

**Dean:** Oh my God! squeaky scream

**Seamus**: I'm hot and Irish I'll save us. I'll use my sexy Irish dancing. Pulls off his shirt and begins to dance

Mass Swoonage. Bear runs away because it can't handle the awsome.

**Ron**: I'm hungery. Let's eat Hermione.

**Hermione:** Snape said no canibalism.

**Ron**: Nuh uh! He said air quotes "you are not to use magic or objects you don't find in the woods. You must also hunt or find your own food" end quotes He never said anything about canabalism.

**Hermione**: I'm to smart to be eaten. Eat Harry.

**Harry**: I'm to famous to be eaten. Eat Seamus.

**Seamus:** I'm to Irish to be eaten. Eat Crabe and Goyle.

**Crab and Goyle**:I blank stares. Some grunting

**Malfoy:** I'm too in need of a latte to be eaten. Eat Neville.

**Neville**: I'm too...too...too weakly in love with trees to be eaten.

**Ron**: Dosen't count! Get him! Students charge at him

**Neville:** screems like a girl and runs away

group chase him. Neville hides in a tree. People runs past him.

**Tree**: petting nevils head Pet the Neville pet the Neville pet the Neville.


End file.
